April is Counseling Awareness Month, and I wanted to share how counseling can be a healthy and helpful experience for people. As a therapist, I can share several reasons why I think this to be true, but I thought it might be more helpful to hear from some of those who have experienced the process themselves. We wanted to share some important aspects of what counseling looks like from the voice of those who have or are doing the hard and precious work of counseling.
Counseling is Empowering
The counseling space is most helpful when the therapist is there to build the person up so they can make their own choices; not to take power away from the client by making choices for them. A client came to me once and asked for me “to help push them over the wall” which I could have done, but the greater gift for both of us was teaching her to find that strength from within and learn to climb the wall while I did it with her, not for her.
Another client described it this way:
“I am a huge advocate for counseling because it truly feels like a gift that keeps giving. Counseling gives you the tools that you need to help you face the challenges in your life, as you try to interact with others, face your fears and worries, and change the inner voice that speaks so loudly at times. I so appreciate life-giving counseling services because it embodies exactly what the name says… Life-giving. Sometimes it takes a while, sometimes it is hard, but counseling has truly given me the chance to live my life again.”
Counseling is Exploring
It can be difficult for people to allow themselves to explore their deepest thoughts and emotion, their strongly held beliefs, past hurts, pain, their spirituality, especially if they were never encouraged to or told not to. It can be challenging for people to let their guard down in counseling to explore these deeper and often darker part of themselves. Counseling gives the opportunity for people to find and speak their silenced voices. And if they choose to, it can bring so much into the light, which is the birthplace of healing.
Listen to this client explain her process:
“Coming from a conservative Christian faith tradition, I heard many spoken and unspoken objections to Christians seeking counseling. The argument against counseling was that a person with traditional psychology training would offer guidance in contradiction to the teachings in the Bible, held as the true source of wisdom.
When faced with relationship issues arising from childhood trauma not directly addressed in the Bible I was at a loss for answers. My sister suggested I read books by Christian counselors that offered her hope. Through what I read I learned that some of my challenges were a result of wrong assumptions about life, relationships, and what a faithful Christ-centered response could look like. But I was not able to face these issues or make the changes needed on my own.
As a result, I started to work with a counselor who is a strong Christian. Her training is in both human psychology, how the brain functions and how we form thoughts and beliefs, and in the teachings in the Bible, and how these interact to inform how Christians view the world and function in it.
What I learned from my experience with my counselor is that there is alignment between how the Bible teaches believers to live with what healthy living and being in the world looks like. I learned skills to challenge my thoughts and assumptions to better align with the truth, and how to be strong in ways that affirm who God created me to be.”
Counseling is Fishing
I have the privilege of walking alongside someone for part of their life journey. I will not be there for their entire journey. I get the honor of being in the presence of someone’s story, their pain, their healing. Counseling may only be for a certain period of time, but the experience and the tools learned can last for a lifetime.
Just like this client describes her time with me:
“A quote comes to mind:‘Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day; teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.’I used to think of counseling more as someone just telling me what to do so I can be fixed.You don’t just tell me what to do so I can survive for the day. You give me tools and ask questions that are helping me learn to counsel myself and live differently for a lifetime.Thank you for teaching me HOW to fish!”
So, counseling is a place where people can explore, be empowered, and learn to fish. If that seems like something you want or need on your life right now, please feel free to reach out to use at Life Giving Counseling Services at 267-371-7191 to start your journey with us.
