First, you should expect a place to tell your story, share your pain, and be fully heard with compassion, care, support, and no judgement.
You might be thinking, “Of course, isn’t that what every counselor would be like?” or at least would say they are like that? Yes, those are frequently used words you would see on a counselor’s website, but go back and truly look at each word, and imagine receiving it authentically. Yes, we are trained in skills and techniques, but you cannot fake those things. It should ooze out of everything we do and say, every look, every response, every question. You deserve a counselor who brings their authentic self into the room with you.
Second, you should expect a safe space where you can be vulnerable and say all those things in your head you are afraid to say out loud. For some people, a counseling room, or the counseling relationship, may be one of the few, or the only, places someone can feel safe enough to do that. We love to create that space. It is a gift to us, a privilege to be allowed into your life, an honor to walk alongside you. We want to hear you; we want to see you; the real you. We want to know what your tears are saying, what your heart holds, what your mind will not let go of. We are not there to pull you down a path you are not ready to go, or push you and tell you where you “should” be going. We are there on the path right next to you, walking alongside every step of the way. That does not mean we will not ask tough questions or ignore harm, but we will do it together. You deserve a safe space.
Third, you should expect growth at your own pace. You should not feel forced or rushed, but intentional and meaningful. Counseling is a place to begin understanding yourself more deeply, recognizing patterns, and learning new ways to respond to life’s challenges. At times, this process may feel uncomfortable or even difficult, because growth often requires us to gently face the very things we have tried to avoid. But you will not be doing that alone. With the right counselor, you will be supported, challenged with care, and equipped with tools that help you move forward at your own pace. You deserve a space where change is possible, where hope is nurtured, and where each step matters and is celebrated together.
Fourth, you should expect a counselor who can reflect on their shortcomings, who continues to grow themselves, continues to study and learn, and can apologize when something is amiss. Maybe we pushed you too hard, too soon; maybe we unintentionally triggered you in session; maybe we need to learn more about a topic before we present ideas to you. Again, we work together on this journey. You deserve a counselor who will do what they are asking you to do: be authentic, be safe, and grow.
